Circle of Influence

July 28, 2026/Julie Stobbe/

Reading time – 8 minutes

Introduction

“Man is a social animal. Anyone who does not partake of society is either a beast or a god.” Aristotle

The vast majority of us need the company of others in order to function and feel fulfilled. That’s why nearly everything that we do is built on a social framework. We play in groups. Nearly all our games and sports require multiple people being involved. We work in groups. Nearly all of our jobs are performed as a member of a team or a group. We learn in groups. From grade school to graduate school we are educated together in class and in classes. We even live and die in groups.

Everything around us is a result of our sociability. “Society”, the very word we use to describe our common, ordered communities, is social. It comes from the Latin word “socius” which means companion. Our family groups are based on our social nature. So is our government, from local to national. Even our economy derives from our need to interact.

We have our immediate family and around them are our closest friends. These are the human beings that we spend the most time with. These are the human beings that we depend upon the most and them on us. These are the human beings who probably have the greatest influence over us. You could call them our “inner circle”.

This blog is about that inner circle and the effect they can have upon us, both positive and negative. The people who form our inner circle have a profound effect on our emotions, our outlook and our ability to achieve success in life. That’s why it’s so important to make sure that our inner circle is as strong and as positive as it can possibly be.

In this blog, you’re going to learn how to develop an inner circle that will empower you to be your very best. In turn, you will then be better able to empower all the individuals in your circle to be their best. They will feed that positive energy back to you and so on. A strong and powerful inner circle of friends is the greatest positive feedback loop there is.

We’re going to start you on the road to a strong inner circle by taking a look at some pitfalls that occur in life that can cause you to end up with an inner circle that is less than it should be. We’ll look at some of the negative personality traits that a weak inner circle usually exhibits and we’ll see how those negative traits can silently and secretly turn your own energy negative.

Next, we’ll look at inner circle power. We’ll look at some of the positive traits that the people who make up your inner circle should exhibit. We’ll also show you how the positive energy of people who exhibit these traits can influence you, making you a better person.

Finally, we’ll look at the steps that you can take to build your own inner circle of strength and power. We’ll examine some of the activities that a power circle should be involved in. You’ll learn how, when you participate in these activities, you will begin to connect with the very people who need to surround yourself with – people who can become a part of your new and improved inner circle.

There is no need to settle for less in life. There are positive steps that you can begin to take today to start getting what you want out of life. One of the most effective of these steps is to begin building a circle of friends around you who will be able to empower you so that you can empower them.

Inner Circle Pitfalls

“Stay Away From Negative People. They Have a Problem for Every Solution” Unknown

We are not only social animals, we are also consensus builders;
Consensus building is a way to avoid conflict;
We are programmed to try and avoid conflict while in social groups;
This is why we strive to be liked and to be accepted;
The danger in this behavior is that it can stifle growth;
People can find themselves being unable to fully realize their potential due to the attitudes of the people in their social circle;
A social circle can either be negative and exclusive or positive and inclusive;
People whose social circle is positive and inclusive find themselves achieving their true potential;
People whose social circle is negative and exclusive have problems experiencing personal growth;
If you feel that the people around you are keeping you from growth, you have a duty to yourself to replace them with people who will empower you to be your true self.

Inner Circle Power

‘You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.’ Jim Rohn

As consensus builders, we tend to reflect the opinions and tastes, the likes and dislikes of the people around us;
This is why on average we tend to act and think like the five people we spend the most time with;
If you are not happy with some of the behaviours exhibited by the people you spend the most time with, then you have to look and see if those behaviours are having a negative effect on you;
If they are, then you have a duty to yourself to take the steps to begin building an inner circle that has the power to support you and nourish your growth;
One way to do this is by understanding the three traits that make up true friendship;
The first of these traits is integrity and it consists of;
- Trustworthiness;
- Honesty;
- Dependability; and
- Loyalty;
The second trait is caring and it consists of;
- Empathy;
- Acceptance;
- Attentiveness;
- Support;
The last trait is congeniality and it consists of;
- Confidence; and
- Humour

Building Your Circle

There are things that you can do to proactively begin to build your inner circle;
One great way to accomplish this is to begin working on improving yourself;
In the process of working on yourself, you are bound to meet like-minded people who you will already have something in common with;
Some excellent areas to look at include;
- Health and wellness;
  - exercise and nutrition
- Personal development;
  - yoga, book clubs, creative activities
- Volunteer work
  - meet people who share your philosophy of giving back
  - spend time in seniors centers, libraries, schools, service groups

Conclusion

It’s just the beginning for you.

You now have all the information that you need to make the necessary adjustments in your inner circle that will reduce the amount of negative energy that surrounds you while at the same time, increasing the positive energy that you need.

You learned that you are the sum total of the five people you spend the most time with, because of that, you saw how powerful an inner circle can become when the right people are involved.

Finally, you learned some of the best ways to go about building your own inner circle of strength and power. Now, it’s time to take what you’ve learned and put it to good use. It’s time to start building an inner circle that will support you and help you achieve the goals that will allow you to live your life fully and completely.

Where did you find your Inner circle?

Julie Stobbe is the 2024-2025 winner of the Harold Taylor Award for outstanding contributions to the organizing industry and Professional Organizers in Canada. As a Trained Professional Organizer and Lifestyle Organizing Coach, she brings happiness to homes and organization to offices, coaching you virtually using Zoom. She has been working with clients since 2006 to provide customized organizing solutions to suit their individual needs and situations. She uses her love of teaching to reduce clutter, in your home, office, mind and time. She guides, mentors and supports you to be accountable for your time, to complete projects and to reach your goals. If you’re in a difficult transition Julie can coach you to break-free of emotional clutter constraining you from living life on your terms. Online courses are available to help instruct, coach and support your organizing projects. Get started by downloading Tips for Reorganizing 9 Rooms.